[Lambert #1]

Man this thread will go on forever and ever. This horse has been beaten to death at least 100 times over the years. I like holdbacks, I say it's a no brainer. Just make sure that your child does not roll over in the computer to the high school because the 4 year clock start just as soon as they are promoted to high school.

[Stardust]

^ I agree, this is something that we go through during every season of the big three sports

[tradition]

You mean 19 correct?


As long as he is not 19 before August 1st of his Sr. year he is fine.

Seen many, many kids hold back for various reasons. I have never, never seen it as a negative!!!!!

I'm sorry , yea I meant 19. Knew that you had to be 18 and had 18 on the brain. Thanks. That could have really messed things up.:thanks:

[Football1]

But as a parent why does it matter if they dominate 6th grade lol thats just crazy.

I totally agree with you. My point is regardless of why a parent holds a kid back (sports, school, band, or to get more free lunch) it benefits the kid in the long run to be more prepared for college or work. The additional year gives them more time to learn and more time to be mature enough to handle the challenges of college and/or workforce life.

And yes - if your kid plays sports the additional year gives them more time to develop and train for what they play. Whether that gets them a better shot at a scholarship or simply a better shot on the court matters not. The point is it gives them time to get better.

[Football1]

^ I agree, this is something that we go through during every season of the big three sports

Sure - but it is important enough to discuss again for the person who started the thread. No harm in having new people weigh in on an old topic, right?

[Buc-a-roo]

Sure - but it is important enough to discuss again for the person who started the thread. No harm in having new people weigh in on an old topic, right?

I certainly think so.:Thumbs:

[willseeuntheHOUSE]

Why hold him back if he was top in class with grades? what grade did you hold him back

As stated earlier there were numerous considerations. To the people that think its cheating then you are being judgemental. My child was going to graduate when he was 17, that was one factor.....he was a little immature for his class.....teachers said he was definitely a follower.....class he was in had some routy characters and these were the kids he looked up to.....class behind him was noted as a kinder, gentler class............the things one needs to consider goes on endlessly and the decision is very difficult. People who think its cheating are the same ones who encourage their children to say bad things about these kids at school without knowing all the details. All situations are different, and these narrow minded people are the exact ones that you better discuss with your child about because they can be very cruel. AGAIN TALK TALK TALK WITH YOUR CHILD AND OTHERS WHO HAVE GONE THRU THIS AND PRAY VERY HARD

[Stardust]

Sure - but it is important enough to discuss again for the person who started the thread. No harm in having new people weigh in on an old topic, right?

No sweat off my back and no reason to take offense. My comment was that this is discussed frequently, where is anything in what I said contradicting that? It will be talked about again in just a few months - no big deal!

[toussaints]

they used to (and most likely still do) practice holding kids back a lot up in Ohio. my dad's friend who coached at Illinois in the early 90's always said that the best football player on the field was held back in 8th grade, but they were the hardest ones to recruit due to their academic eligibility they usually had sub-standard grades and/or test scores in high school because they really didn't care about it or felt that athletics were far superior to academics.

i know a good amount of people that would have their son play on the freshman team in 8th grade instead of hold them back, which was fine as long as they didn't dress and play varsity

[IAM22]

If a player is "promoted" from 8th grade and you decide to hold them back and put them into the 8th grade again, they will not be able to play their Senior year. Once promoted from 8th grade the clock starts.

[hitemup]

The effects of holding back can go either way. A lot of it depends on the kid and a lot on the parents. Every situation is different. There are so many factors to consider when doing it. Most of them have been mentioned. I have no problem with holding back when it is based on academics or age, but if it is strictly for the purpose of athletics then I am not as big of a fan. There are way more important things in life then being middle school champions in something. Lets be realistic how many kids have gotten a scholarship or went pro because of that extra year of middle school. I am in no way saying that it does or will not have a positive impact on performance because it may, but that one year is not going to get them a D1 scholarship offer.

[Stardust]

The effects of holding back can go either way. A lot of it depends on the kid and a lot on the parents. Every situation is different. There are so many factors to consider when doing it. Most of them have been mentioned. I have no problem with holding back when it is based on academics or age, but if it is strictly for the purpose of athletics then I am not as big of a fan. There are way more important things in life then being middle school champions in something. Lets be realistic how many kids have gotten a scholarship or went pro because of that extra year of middle school. I am in no way saying that it does or will not have a positive impact on performance because it may, but that one year is not going to get them a D1 scholarship offer.

Great post. Very articulate and right on point

[Has Been]

We could debate forever what the orginal poster said and how he said it, but it's purpose was to get his son in a position to compete athletically. So, he wants to cheat against other kids is what it comes down to! Good grief!

How can it be cheating when every single kid in the state has the opportunity to take advantage of this?...It's not like only a few schools or a certain about of kids can do this....If you don't want to do it, then you have the right not to do it but don't complain when others do. It's kind of like voting everyone can participate but only a few do so....BTW, this is coming from someone who has no kids and was never held back but sure wishes he was.

[Stardust]

^ Solid post. I don't agree with you 100%, but fair logic!

[Doughboy304]

People are always so quick to judge others. This post is from a parent that allowed his son to hold back for athletic reasons and I will say that it was the best choice for him. He looked so much more comfortable his second 8th grade year and his leadership skills made a big difference in the locker room. People are going to agree with you about holding your child back and some will disagree, but in the end you and your child have to live with that choice. An advantage for me is the fact that I get to enjoy my son for one more year before I send him off into college life.

[Skunk]

People are always so quick to judge others. This post is from a parent that allowed his son to hold back for athletic reasons and I will say that it was the best choice for him. He looked so much more comfortable his second 8th grade year and his leadership skills made a big difference in the locker room. People are going to agree with you about holding your child back and some will disagree, but in the end you and your child have to live with that choice. An advantage for me is the fact that I get to enjoy my son for [B]one more year before I send him off into college life[/B].

So you are living your life through your son! Good grief!

[undercoverwildcat]

The school says they will not retain my 8th grade student. They have a board policy that will not allow this to happen. Can I remove him at this point in the year and put him in the 7th grade at another school? Would another school do this? What other options do I have?

[HDE]

We could debate forever what the orginal poster said and how he said it, but it's purpose was to get his son in a position to compete athletically. So, he wants to cheat against other kids is what it comes down to! Good grief!

How is it cheating if the student is not 19 before Aug. 1 of his senior year?

[new o]

Family decision. Worry about your own child and let others worry about theirs. I held all 3 of my kids back, one of them does not even like sports but I still held him back. I want to keep them home as long as I can because I trully love them and want to make sure they are ready for the real world. Its not cheating because it does not break rules.

[nannook]

So you are living your life through your son! Good grief!

The point he is making has nothing to do with sports or 'living'" through his son. Its having your child part of your life for one more year. Having them at home, being part of their daily life. After they leave for college, things change, it’s just the natural course

[Bobcat_Dad]

How is it cheating if the student is not 19 before Aug. 1 of his senior year?

I agree. It is not. The state made the rule for a reason. It is a parents decision and theirs alone.

[charlie22]

I agree. It is not. The state made the rule for a reason. It is a parents decision and theirs alone.

Actually it is not the parents' decision. It's the principal's decision. If the principal thinks a kid did well enough in the 8th grade and is ready for the 9th grade, the kid will be promoted regardless of what the parents think. That is the law in Kentucky. Unfortunately, there are some administrators in some school districts that ignore the law and do whatever the parents request.

Which is why undercoverwildcat said in his/her last post that the kid will not be retained. Kudos to that school district for following the law.

But what really bothers me, of all the posts made, is the post by BADCAT74saying that varsity coaches approached him about holding his son back. It would be one thing if teachers or the guidance counselor approached me about holding my son back; but coaches? I'd be inclined to wonder if their interest was just for athletic reasons (and perhaps for the coaches' own best interests instead of perhaps my child's). Maybe the varsity coaches in that case are also his teachers and based their advise on their observations as his teachers. If so, it doesn't bother me. But I'd guess, if I had to guess, if that was the case, BADCAT74 would have said his child's teachers approached him.

My thoughts on the subject: if I had a child that was very young for his/he class and the child was struggling in the class room or was having real and legitimate emotional problems, then I'd sit down with the guidance counselor, teachers, principal and physician and get their input. I would never, repeat never, do it for athletic reasons. Furthermore, I can't see me holding a child back that would make him/her old for their class.

I had several kids in my class at high school that were retained (adults called it retained; kids call it flunked). They didn't lose the "flunked" stigma throughout their high school years. Admittedly, we didn't have many kids retained, so when it happened it was unusual. If it happens frequently in a school, perhaps it wouldn't carry the stigma. Of course, if it happened frequently, one might wonder what was going on in that school district.

[Fly Like a Duck]

Why are we, as a society so appauled at the thought of parents holding their son/daughter back in a grade, even if it has a little bit to do with athletics; in hopes of helping their son/daughter get college paid for?

Fact of the matter is, great grades and great athletic performance= college is free (as well as just great academic performance alone). What bothers me is the fact that if 13 year old, John Doe who is around an average student who is maybe in drama or band gets held back, then so be it, nobody gives a flip. But, let it that same kid play a sport, and he/she be halfway decent in their sport(s) then let's blow the roof off in an uproar and people in the school community cry, "Well, his parents just held him back for sports..blah, blah, blah...gripe, gripe, gripe...b!tch, b!tch, b!tch."

I look at academics just like I look at athletics in the sense of, how good are you really? How much can you improve? What can you do to get better? Unless you are literally a rocket scientist in the making then what can being held back really hurt? Today's kids in high school have so many more opportunities than we had in terms of classes offered and even being ablel to earn college credits. It's not like if they get held back they can't excersise the resources offered to challenge themselves more academically (through excelled honor classes to even taking honor classes that allow them to earn college credits in high school, to even having the ability to take college courses online while in high school).

Has anybody who is against holding back the good student-athlete (in both) ever thought that it could be more beneficial to their long term academic success? Maybe holding back the 8th grader who doesnt turn 14 until the June before his freshmen year (meaning he would turn 18 the summer he graduates) who is an average athlete, but a great student will allow him/her to start earning college credits his junior year of high school, all the while allowing them to gain a little more advantage on the playing fields? Why is that so bad of a thought? I dont get it.

I read where somebody posted that they felt if a student needs to be held back for athletic reasons, then they just aren't a very good athlete; that might be true. I read that as basically saying, a kid either has IT or the they don't. So, why can't it be viewed the same way in academics? If a kid is brilliant, is holding them back to where they take the same classes over again really going to negatively effect them that much? If a kid is brilliant, they are brilliant. Is taking 8th grade Pre Algebra over again, when they made an 'A' in it already really going to have that much (if any) of a negative effect on his/her progress in the future? Or is that just a mentality where we just assume is true b/c, well, everybody else says it; so screw it, Ill feel that way, too?

I'm like others on here who have very rarely, if ever seen negative effects of holding kids back.

[MTNS RULE]

If he is promoted to the 9th grade, He is a freshman eligibility wise. Doesnt matter if he is in the 8th or not. The only way he stays back is to go back to 7th and is is promoted to the 8th.This is a situation you need to check on your self and not take BGR posters advice.If he is promoted to the 9th grade and stays back his junior season will be his last by rule

[Platinum & Gold]

Just start them at age 6 and have them turn 7 during kindergarden year, that will put them graduating at 19 and you don't have to worry about hold back status.

I got two sons, ones birthday is in May, one in December, both started when they were 6 and turned 7 during kindergarden.

[HDE]

That makes the most sense, but not everyone plans that well. What's strange is, the person who does that isn't criticized and someone who holds their child back is, even though they are the same age as seniors.

[MCHSHornets#5]

I think holding kids back in certain cases can be a good thing, in academics and atheltics. My brother stayed back and repeated 8th grade and this helped his academics as well as in atheltics. His grades got better and also he hit a major growth spurt. He went from being 5'8 or 5'9 and 140-145 pounds to being 6'3 and 170 pounds. I think for some kids holding them back helps a lot in maturity and everything else. Now instead of showcasing the atheltic abilities his growth spurt gave him for 3 years in high school, he can now do it for 4 years. Now as far as competing in high school atheltics after being held back, he cannot unless he is still younger than 14 years old (I think that's the correct age I'm not really sure) but if he is 14 years of age or older he can't unless he wants to lose a year of elibility while in high school.

[Southeast Bluegrass]

It is one of the best decisions you'll ever make. You'll have to work with your school to get it done. Just watch the age if sports is envolved to make sure eligibility is retained. I held back mine and grades improved drastically. Maturity improved. Huge Scholarships rewarded. Kids say best thing I ever done for them. And hey, they aren't thrown out into the world. Get to spend another year home with mom and dad. What's the rush? A mature mind will make mature decisions.

[toussaints]

I don't have any issues with holding a kid back for athletic reasons, but it's something I'll never practice. I've seen the positives and negatives to it. Some families do it right and the kid becomes more mature mentally and physically. Then there are families that mess it up and the kid loses focus academically because they know the specific reason why they're held back.

It's a decision where the kid, parent(s), and school really need to buy into it. There are a number of teachers out there that will refuse to teach a kid that was held back for non academic and non social reasons.

[MCHSHornets#5]

Well for the most part it depends on the parents. Even if the kid knows exactly why he was held back and it was for sports the parents can still keep him/her focused on acedemics too by saying to the kid "if you dont keep your grades up then i'm not allowing you to play what ever sport it may be whether you or the coaches like it." My brother was told this and because he wanted to continue to play football he was forced to keep his grades up. It comes down to the parents on whether or not the effects of being held back are positive or negative.